Ever run into someone you know professionally? You both smile and chat and catch up on life. It feels good. Connection.
Ever go to a networking meeting where people are asking for help? Where everyone seems to be offering their suggestions based on their experience and wisdom. It feels good. Support.
Ever try to do business with someone and they stop returning your texts/emails/FB messages? You are reaching out because you believed in them. It felt good. Until it didn't.
Then people say what they have to say. And it is frankly often business speak.
What is business speak? Saying one thing in your words and the underlying message is the opposite.
High emotional intelligence comes from observing yourself and your thoughts, feelings and beliefs
based on your experiences with people. When you feel disconnected from the connection...breathe in, breathe out, smile and listen to the underlying message.
When you feel unsupported by your desire to support....breathe in, breathe out, smile and listen to the underlying message.
The words that people SAY speaks more about THEM than it does about YOU.
How you think, feel and what you believe about what they say is about YOU.
Below are three experiences I have had recently where there has been business speak. With translations:
"It's great to see you! Let's grab coffee sometime": I do not want to see you. You do not serve me at all and I do not want to even spend 30 minutes with you.
"We have decided to go in a different direction": I do not want to talk with you about business at all. You did something we didn't like but we aren't going to discuss it with you.
"It would behoove you to tone yourself down": I hate you and what you stand for and you are making me so uncomfortable so SHUT UP NOW!
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